Most Facebook users have low self-esteem

Most Facebook users have low self-esteem

Facebook is used mostly by narcissists and those with low self-esteem, says a Canadian study.

These type of people use Facebook as a self-promotional tool, says psychology researcher Soraya Mehdizadeh of York University.

Mehdizadeh, who extensively examined the online habits and personalities of 100 Facebook users aged 18 to 25 years old, found that individuals higher in narcissism and lower in self-esteem spent more time on the site and filled their pages with more self-promotional content.

"We all know people like this. They are updating their status every five minutes and the photos they post are very carefully construed," she says.

"The question is, are these really accurate representations of the individual or are they merely a projection of who the individual wants to be?"

Mehdizadeh says she was struck by the fact that those with lower self-esteem were more apt to use this social networking tool.

As part of her research, she examined five features of participants' Facebook pages for self-promotion: the 'about me' section, the main photo, the first 20 pictures on the 'view photos of me' section, notes, and status updates.

Describing self-promotion by Facebook users as any descriptive or visual information that attempted to persuade others about one's own positive qualities, Mehdizadeh assessed facial expression (striking a pose or making a face) and picture enhancement (using photo editing software) in the main photo and 'view photos of me' sections.

Further, she examined the use of positive adjectives, self-promoting mottos, and metaphorical quotes in the 'about me' section. Self-promotion in the notes section could include posting results from Facebook applications including 'my celebrity look-alikes,' which compares a photo of the user to celebrities, or vain online quiz results.

After this, she used the Rosenberg Self-Esteem Scale to measure participants' self-esteem. Narcissism was assessed by using the Narcissism Personality Inventory, according to a university release.

From the gender perspective, Mehdizadeh says she found that men displayed more self-promotional content in the 'about me' and notes sections, whereas women demonstrated more self-promotion in the main photo section.

"I thought this was an interesting way to apply theoretical paradigms in psychology to online self-presentation, which is still a fairly new concept,'' says the Canadian researcher.

"I believe the next question to be answered is whether or not the use of such websites could be used to improve one's self-esteem and overall sense of well-being. This sort of finding may have great implications in the lives of the socially anxious or depressed,'' according to the researcher.

The study has been published in the journal Cyber psychology, Behavior, and Social Networking.

Source: Gurmukh Singh/IANS

Modern Etiquette: How to decline Facebook friends without offence

Modern Etiquette: How to decline Facebook friends without offence 

Saying no to friend requests from colleagues can be a tricky thing.

A colleague I just met at work has invited me to be their friend on Facebook. I don't want to offend them, but nor do I want to share my candid photos and lousy Scrabble scores with someone I hardly know.

Can I ignore their invite?

"Can I be your friend?" might work as an ice-breaker among small children, but it's not a question you hear often between adults, at least not outside of Las Vegas.

Friendship, it is generally understood, is a relationship that evolves through shared interests, common experiences and a primeval need to share your neighbor's power tools.

Yet for many people, Facebook permits a return to the simplicity of the schoolyard.

Rather than inviting someone to be our Facebook friend only after we've become friends in the real world, many of us are using Facebook as a short-cut around all that time-consuming relationship building.

Why bother asking someone you've just met questions about their family, interests and ability to run a farm or aquarium, when you can simply send them a friend request and read the answers in your Facebook news feed? And so we think little of receiving friend requests after we meet someone for the first time at, say, a dinner party.

If you like the person, perhaps because they brought an excellent bottle of wine to the party, then you can accept the request in the hope of further opportunities to sample the contents of their cellar.

If you didn't get to taste the wine because they accidentally spilled the bottle over your brand new party dress, then etiquette experts would probably agree that you can decline the friend request, send them a dry-cleaning bill and humiliate them in a derisory posting to your real Facebook friends.

In the workplace, however, the dynamic is very different. The consequences of offending someone by ignoring their friend request are greater with a colleague you see every day than with a careless dining companion you may never meet again.

So why are people you work with increasingly offering to share their Facebook output?

Joan Morris DiMicco, an IBM researcher who studies social software in the workplace, said it's partly because some people just don't anticipate the ramifications of sharing their personal life with colleagues.

But it's also a function of the Facebook interface, which recommends other people for you to friend.

"Once you've connected to one person you work with you get recommendations to connect to others that you work with," she said.

Of course, many people don't have a problem with being Facebook friends with colleagues, especially those they know well. But for those who would rather keep their work and private lives separate, there are options other than ignoring an unwanted friend request.

One is to accept the invitation and then use Facebook's privacy settings to limit the flow of information between you and your new "friend." To do this, you can create a "colleagues" list from the Friends menu and then add to it your new friend. Then navigate to the privacy settings and use the "Profile Information" section to control what information people on the "colleagues" list can see.

An alternative, says workplace etiquette expert Barbara Pachter, is to suggest to the colleague that you connect instead on LinkedIn, a social network for professional relationships.

"You can just go ahead and ask them to join you on LinkedIn and hope they forget they sent you a Facebook friend request," said Pachter, the author of New Rules @ Work.

"Or you can say, Thanks for asking me. I'm keeping Facebook for my family and friends. I'm asking you to join me on my professional network instead.'"

Pachter said that whatever you do, it's important not to offend your colleague -- and that's not just because politeness is good etiquette.

"The person you offend might end up being your boss next year," she said.

Got a question about the etiquette of email, social networks and other workplace technologies? Send them to richard.baum@reuters.com or via Twitter to @rbaum.

Source: Reuters

Emotions play crucial role in decision-making

Emotions play crucial role in decision-making

A new study from Columbia University has revealed that emotions play a crucial role while negotiating offers.

Scientists Andrew Stephen and Michel Tuan Pham looked at the interplay of emotion and reason in everyday deal making and found that our negotiating skills depend on our emotions to some extent.

The participants were made to play a classic negotiation game called the “ultimatum game.”

In the ultimatum game, one person (the “proposer”) has a given amount of cash, which he is told to divide with a second person any way he likes. The catch is that the second person must either accept the offer or reject it entirely, no negotiation allowed. If he rejects it, both players walk away with nothing.

For the study, the researchers manipulated how much participants trusted their feelings before they played a series of ultimatum games for real money.

They asked some of the participants to think of two occasions in their past when trusting their feelings to make decisions resulted in good outcomes.

People generally find it easy to think of two such occasions, giving participants greater confidence in trusting their own emotions while making decisions.

Other participants were told to think of 10 occasions when trusting their feelings to make decisions resulted in poor outcomes this made participants wary of trusting their feelings.

Then all the participants played a computerized version of the ultimatum game, in the role of “proposer.”

The researchers found that participants who were more confident in following their emotions offered somewhat less money than the others.

This is because they were more focused on the “gist” of the offer itself (and what felt good), rather than on estimating the other player’s possible reaction and calculating the probabilities of payoff. In short, the immediacy of the offer trumped the more complicated calculation.

The researchers believe that emotional negotiators actually have an easier time visualizing the offer itself: They picture themselves offering someone 20 dollars from their 50 dollars pot and it feels “okay.”

The study appears Psychological Science, a journal of the Association for Psychological Science.

Source: ANI

Computers games ‘bring families together’

Computers games ‘bring families together’

Contrary to the commonly held belief that computer games make people anti-social, a new research indicates that they bring families together.

During the research, Bond University's Dr Jeffrey Brand found that a growing number of parents are playing such games with their kids.

Brand found that 88 per cent of Australian homes have at least one device for video or computer games, reports the Courier Mail.

Seventy per cent of parents in such households play computer or video games, and of those, 80 per cent play them with their children.

Brand said the oldest person involved in the study was an 88-year-old who played computer games with his wife.

More than 1600 families were surveyed for the study.

Source: ANI

Men can detect infidelities better

Men can detect infidelities better

Unfaithful women better watch out, for according to a new research, men are better at detecting a cheating partner than females, and they’re more likely to suspect infidelities that don't exist.

Scientists found that men were able to spot a cheating heart in more than nine out of ten cases.

They were also more likely to catch out their partner's lies than women.

The flip side is that to counter this constant vigilance, women may be better than men at concealing illicit liaisons.

Paul Andrews at Virginia Commonwealth University in Richmond and colleagues gave 203 young heterosexual couples confidential questionnaires asking them whether they had ever strayed, and whether they suspected or knew their partner had strayed.

In this, 29 per cent of men said they had cheated, compared with 18.5 per cent of women.

The men were better than women at judging fidelity.

"Eighty per cent of women's inferences about fidelity or infidelity were correct, but men were even better, accurate 94 per cent of the time," says Andrews.

They were also more likely to catch out a cheating partner, detecting 75 per cent of the reported infidelities compared with 41 per cent discovered by women. However, men were also more likely to suspect infidelity when there was none.

Andrews says this makes evolutionary sense because unlike women, men can never be certain a baby is theirs.

He said: "Men have far more at stake. When a female partner is unfaithful, a man may himself lose the opportunity to reproduce, and find himself investing his resources in raising the offspring of another man."

"This adds to the evidence that men have evolved defences to detect their partner's infidelity," says David Buss at the University of Texas, Austin.

He adds that it demonstrates a "fascinating cognitive bias that leads men to err on the side of caution by overestimating a partner's infidelity".

Andrews suggests that women have countered this by becoming better at covering up affairs.

Complex statistical analysis of the data hinted that a further 10 per cent of the women in the study had cheated on top of the 18.5 per cent who admitted to it in the questionnaires, whereas the men had been honest about their philandering.

Source: ANI

Filing the 'love return'

Filing the 'love return'

My annual financial accounts were submitted to the tax authorities last week. Through statements of profit and loss and a balance sheet, I had a glimpse of my net worth — money made and losses incurred.

Now here’s a question? How about compiling an annual return on our relationships? Let’s say, we prepare a statement of account on our associations, how would we go about it?

Financial statements comprise income and expenses, assets and liabilities, net worth and return on capital. In a world of feelings and emotions, what would construe as income or gain? Who would be our asset and liability?

Short-term losses
I’m hoping some people in the confines of their homes, temples or mosques, rosaries in have, has muttered my name to the lord — that is ‘income’ big time!

I’ve made new friends and been generous to my staff. My heart brims with joy for the million moments I spend with my young son — all this would construe as investments.

Since relationships need to be nurtured. I look upon my spouse as an investment too, although with mood swings, temper tantrums and an expansive shopping list. The return on this investment fluctuates.

I consider the tiffs, phases of disagreements and domestic squabbles ‘short-term losses’. She wants me to consider the last lashing from her as ‘long term capital gain’. In the future, if she contemplates cosmetic surgery, then I will treat that as ‘dividend on investment’.

The scalp showing through increasingly with every haircut is ‘loss carried forward to next year’. If an email or letter arrives from an ex-girlfriend, I will account it under ‘income from other sources’. The friendly young mothers at my child’s playschool are to be treated as a ‘windfall’.

But seriously, won’t it be great to assess our relationships, gauge the quantum of our feelings through these annual returns on relationships? Every relationship is an unwritten contract anyway and comes with a presumption of performance, adherence to its ‘clauses’, and whether we like it or not, we do weigh our gains and losses.

So let’s add, multiply, subtract, and divide our associations. I promise the outcome will be more exciting than our real financial figures. You can file this return to me.

Depression is real, so is recovery/Health

Depression is real, so is recovery

Depression can affect anyone at any age, including children, adolescents, adults, and the elderly. Depression can be fatal. Without treatment, depression kills thousands of people around the world each year

Fortunately, depression is highly treatable. Recovery rates for depression surpass treatment success rates for many other physical illnesses including heart disease. With early intervention and effective treatment, 60% to 80% of those suffering from depression can recover and reclaim functional, fulfilling lives.

Don’t let depression destroy your life and dreams, there is hope, there is help.

Take action

Follow the 3 steps outlined below. You may save your life or the life of someone you know.

Step 1: Know the signs and symptoms of depression:

• Persistent sad, anxious, or 'empty' mood
• Feelings of hopelessness, pessimism
• Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, helplessness
• Loss of interest or pleasure in hobbies and activities
• Decreased energy, fatigue, being 'slowed down'
• Difficulty concentrating, remembering, making decisions
• Difficulty sleeping, early-morning awakening, or oversleeping
• Appetite and/or weight changes
• Thoughts of death or suicide; suicide attempts
• Restlessness, irritability
• Persistent physical symptoms

Not everyone who is depressed experiences every symptom. Some people experience only a few symptoms; some people suffer many. The severity of symptoms varies among individuals and also over time.

Step 2: Get help

Talk to your healthcare provider.

• The first step to getting treatment is a physical examination by a doctor to rule out other possible causes for the symptoms.
• Next the doctor should conduct a diagnostic evaluation for depression or refer the patient to a mental health professional for this evaluation.
• Depending on the type of depression that you may be suffering, various treatments are available, including medication and psychotherapy.

Step 3: Have hope

Depression is a treatable illness. The majority of people with depressive disorders improve when they receive appropriate treatment. Treatment of depression may include medication, talk therapy, support groups, or other strategies that you and your health care provider may want to try.

Remember! The right treatment is the one that works best for you.

Tips on Love, relationship and dating

Tips on Love, relationship and dating

Here are some simple and effective tips that could redefine your concept of relationship to a greater extent.

1. Even if you are dating someone you know, it is best to meet him or her at a public place such as a park or a restaurant. A public place provides safety and security.

2. If you are familiar with your date, you should have an idea of his or hers likes and dislikes. Create a list of activities that you and your date would both love to do.

3. Remember that the date should be fun. Bring laughter into the conversation by bringing out your sense of humor through jokes. Make every activity light and happy.

4. Calling your date right after you went out together to say thanks is a more personal approach.

5. Do not appear too needy by talking to your date over the phone for hours. Keep the chat short and simple.

6. Do not let your nerves overpower you when talking to your date. If you have to, try practicing what you are going to say beforehand.

7. Even if your date doesn't see you, she would definitely appreciate if you are talking with a happy grin as it would come across the phone line.

8. Sending messages through your mobile phone are fun and convenient, but is easily misinterpreted.

9. Pleasant surprises are far better than defeated expectations. If the phone rings, let them leave a message and respond as soon as you are ready to call back.

10. If you said you call, do so, even if it is to let them down gently. Expecting a call that never comes is a worst thing that you can do to someone.

11. Just before calling it a day, try out an aromatic bath and spray on your own irresistible brand of perfume. Tempt him with a sexy smelling you.

12. Discover your sexy touch and lead her on with a head massage followed by a full body massage and don’t forget the sensual massage oils.

13. Tired of monotony? Surprise him with a sexy little dance of your own and pick up the laciest lingerie for it.

14. On a relaxed Sunday afternoon, cuddle up to him with the fragrance of freshly washed hair making sensual magic.

15. Do something naughty together like have an ice cream for dinner or have a shower together.

16. A cocktail at night or a coffee early morning, had together cuddled up between the sheets is sure to be bang on.

17. Wanna spend the day in the bed with your partner? Get dark drapes and red scarves to cover the lamps in your bedroom to strike the right note.

18. Without quality time, your relationship will not survive. Carve out at least half an hour a night and at least one day a month when you the two of you spend time exclusively together.

19. You will both need security, comfort. A good relationship is built on compromise and a great deal of give and take on both sides.

20. Keep your dependence and independence in balance. Tell and show your partner how much you need him, but don’t cling, as that can make your partner trapped.

21. Encourage him to listen to you, by showing appreciation when he does. By the same token, show interest when he talks to you. Be aware that most men aren’t mentally programmed for conversation in the way women are. They need more silence and internal time.

22. Make him appreciate you. Don’t wait for a spontaneous compliment, but say something good about yourself and ask for his agreement.

23. Research suggests you need five positive experiences to erase the memory of one negative experience. So give five kind words for each rude comment. Give five hugs for each cold shoulder.

24. Learn to do the one thing that is most likely to restore good feeling in your relationship---giving your partner a genuine, loving and approving smile.

25. Often those subtle quirks that first attracted you to your partner can, with time, turn around and become annoying habits.

26. Hidden resentments poison a relationship; so if something bothers you, say it. Remember that while men are wary of emotional conversations, they love to find solutions.

27. Learn that punishing your partner won’t work. It may make you feel better to give him a hard time, but it will actually make him dig his heels in more.

28. Money is the main cause of couple conflict. For a relationship to work, you need to address finances and work out a budget.

29. If the domestic work is not divided fairly between you, it will cause friction in your relationship. Make a list of the domestic tasks, talk it through with your partner and mobilize the whole family to share the work.

30. If you have children, involve your partner as much as possible with childcare –even if you feel he’s not as good as it at you are. It’s important to present a united front to your kids.

31. Learn how to negotiate. Each of you states what you want, then both of you work together to find a way forward.

32. Don’t assume you won’t be tempted to have an affair as almost everyone is. You need to learn to resist. If you do stray, don’t feel it spells the end of your relationship. Most couples recover, particularly from one-night-stand, and often find that unrooting the cause of the affair helps them to get even closer. So, you need to learn to resist. But don’t think that an affair is the end of everything.

33. Remember that boredom typically covers up anger. If you feel bored with him, ask yourself what you’re angry about.

34. Be aware that men feel overwhelmed by emotion more than women do. If he’s angry or tearful, half an hour’s ‘unflooding’ time to himself will help get his balance back and make him more able to interact positively with you.

35. Learn how to argue well. The trick is to never say anything that you wouldn’t want to hear said to you.

36. Get prepared for dating. If you really want to succeed in the dating game, decide who you are looking for, do your research and be ready to commit to dating.

37. Wearing provocative or inappropriate clothing risk making the wrong impression if you are going on a first date. Wear clothes that are appropriate to the venue, and at the same time your date would be familiar with.

SOURCE: INDIA SYNDICATE

13 brilliant ways to keep your brain young/Health

13 brilliant ways to keep your brain young

As a silver surfer, I was pleased to see that research has found going online can boost your brain power. I think the amount of problem solving your brain has to do when tracking down information on the net is similar to playing chess or bridge. In other words, it has your grey matter working overtime. However, logging on is just one of many things we can all do to help our brains fight ageing.

Although it's important to realise that a single lifestyle change won't reverse a lifetime of bad health habits, latest research suggests many factors can play a part in keeping your brain young and alert.

So here's a guide to what's well worth a try...

(1) Surf the net
Don't feel guilty about idle surfing - using the net is a good workout for your brain. University of California researchers compared the brains of middle-aged people who rarely went online with regular users who were otherwise similar. After doing web searches for an hour a day for five days, areas of the prefrontal cortex - the part of the brain which controls the ability to make decisions and learn - was much more active in the net users.

(2) Drink a hot choccie
I enjoy a hot chocolate drink every night before bed, so I'm very glad to know it could help keep my brain alert. Recent research found that flavanols - plant chemicals abundant in dark chocolate - stave off fatigue and boost mental sharpness. It's thought that they work by widening blood vessels, boosting blood flow to the brain.

The scientists doing the test asked people to do a range of mental arithmetic tests before and after having a flavanolrich chocolate drink and found the drink boosted their performance.

(3) Work up a sweat
This is my favourite brain booster and one I've experienced first hand. When I was preparing for a cycle ride a few years ago, about six weeks into hard training I started to notice my memory has improved - it was like being a teenager again! I soon realised this was due to all the extra oxygen being pumped into my brain.

A recent Swedish study backed up my own experience when it found that any exercise that gets you out of breath improves IQ scores in tests. The researchers speculated that the increased flow of oxygen to the brain actually promotes the production of new brain cells.

(4) Meditate
This is one habit that works for me when I'm travelling - I let my mind become still and settle into a kind of twilight state, similar to that reached by meditation, for a few minutes.

Afterwards my brain feels recharged and so much brighter. Research by the Center for Spirituality and the Mind at the University of Pennsylvania has come to a similar conclusion. The researchers found that people who meditate enjoy improved brain function - including better memories.

In another study, people who meditate performed better than their non-meditating counterparts on a series of mental agility tests.

(5) Stand on your head
Research suggests that this parlour trick may improve your overall brain health by increasing blood flow to the brain. Of course, for those of us without the gymnastic skill to do it safely, there are easier ways to get the same benefits including hanging your head over the sofa for a few minutes, or lying on the floor with your feet up on a wall.

(6) Brush and floss daily
We keep learning more and more about how dental hygiene can affect our whole body, and now a study had found that oral health is linked to brain health. A team of British researchers found that people with gum disease scored relatively badly on cognitive function tests.

The researchers deduced that the gum inflammation may also be damaging the white matter in the brain, resulting in slower mental function.

(7) Get married
Middle-aged people in a stable relationship are half as likely to develop dementia as those who live alone, according to a study from Sweden. This link is pretty well established and it's all down to the constant social interaction married couples enjoy. Just talking about the shopping or the latest news means we avoid social and intellectual isolation. And of course it means you might indulge in a brain-boosting spot of sex...

(8) Sing a song
The deep breathing needed for singing forces more oxygen into the brain, while memorising lyrics and rhythms gives the brain a thorough workout. Anecdotal studies, supported by UK Alzheimer's charities, have also found singing to be good at improving communication in dementia patients.

(9) Drink red wine
In mental arithmetic tests set up by a team at Northumbria University, men and women did better after being given resveratrol, the "wonder ingredient" in red wine. It's thought the plant chemical found in grape skins - as well as most berries - increases blood flow to the brain by widening blood vessels. Personally, I think a handful of berries on breakfast cereal is the healthiest way to get plenty of this nutrient.

(10) Have an apple a day
Drinking two glasses of apple juice a day could help to keep your brain healthy, according to a study in the Journal Of Alzheimer's Disease. Apple juice seems to reduce the amount of a protein that is responsible for forming the sticky plaques commonly found in the brains of dementia patients and thought to impair memory.

(11) Make love
Sex boosts the levels of a brain chemical called prolac tin which appears to help create and nurture new nerve cells in the brain, according to Professor Perry Bartlett of the University Of Queensland's Brain Institute, Australia. Here's yet another reason to keep the home fires burning.

(12) Be a bit different
When I first read that varying everyday activities could keep your brain in good shape, I began to start brushing my teeth using the other hand and reversing the way I hold a phone. Taking a different route to work or simply swapping your knife and fork around can also help. These little changes all force your brain to adapt to new things and create new pathways, which helps keep more brain cells alive.

(13) Wake up and smell the coffee
Three to five cups of coffee a day when you are middle-aged can cut your risk of developing dementia later in life by up to two thirds, a large, 21-year Finnish study revealed when it was published in the Journal Of Alzheimer's Disease last year.

Source: Daily Mirror

Seven ways to sniff out Infidelity

Seven ways to sniff out Infidelity!

Not sure if your partner is true to you? Well, then here are a few signs that may help sniff out whether he/she is lying or not.

Here are seven ways to identify a liar, reports Fox News.

1. Consider the person’s recall: Liars never forget what they have to say but they may stumble when telling a tale by making contradicting statements. They’re also eager to change the subject.
2. Observe the person’s overall body language: Liars can look ill at ease, fiddling with their hair, stroking their throat, or rubbing their eyes. With their body often turned away from you, you may notice hand or leg fidgeting. Liars also have trouble swallowing and may shake their heads after a point has been made. When the subject finally gets changed, they appear happier and more comfortable, maybe laughing nervously.
3. Take notice of any defensiveness: Liars will often take offence to any indication that they’re under suspicion. They’re likely to throw any accusations you throw at them back at you. They will also talk too much, feeling the need to over-explain themselves.
4. Home in on facial expressions: Liars fail to control their micro-expressions. While fibbing, you may notice nervous twitching. Their hand may be covering or touching their face. People also tend to touch the mouth when feeling guilty or anxious. They’re particularly good with fake smiles.
5. Don’t overlook the Pinocchio reaction: When a human tells a lie, extra blood gets pumped through the body and the nose swells by a fraction of millimeter. Liars may subsequently touch the tip of their nose unconsciously.
6. Concentrate on the eyes: A liar has a troubled brow and downcast or darting eyes. They have trouble directly engaging your gaze. They also give you eye-accessing clues. If the person is telling you the truth, he’ll look up and to the left since that’s the side of the brain we use for recalling information. If she’s lying, she’ll look up and to the right, which is the creative side of the brain, because she’s mentally constructing something that hasn’t happened.
7. Note the person’s voice: The higher the stakes are, the more the liar has a fear of getting caught. With this, the liar has a harder time controlling his body language or her voice. The pitch or rate of the speech may change, with the individual giving a lot of “umms” and “ahhs.” Often, a liar will appear stilted and monotone. Answers may seem rehearsed.

Source: ANI

Can best friends be good life partners?

Can best friends be good life partners?

Can best friends be good life partners? Tennis star Sania Mirza probably didn't think so as she called off her engagement to childhood friend Mohammad Sohrab Mirza due to 'incompatibility' issues.

While it's hard to pinpoint the ingredients of a perfect marriage, psychiatrist Samir Parikh says one reason for incompatibility can be that a commitment happens too quickly, bringing along faulty expectations.

"Good friends can be excellent life partners, but there are no such rules that come with it. It is a matter of understanding and appreciating each other and then building a relationship. Sometimes a commitment happens quickly, bringing along a lot of faulty expectations," Parikh, who is a consultant psychiatrist at Max Healthcare in New Delhi, told IANS.

Psychiatrist Sanjay Chugh believes that bonding of partners at a physical, emotional and mental level is extremely important.

"There needs to be a healthy sync between two people for the relationship to become strong and satisfying. If they have a conflicting personality coupled with low levels of tolerance to distress, there would be a greater number of disappointments in the relationship.

"On the contrary, if partners are able to blend well and appreciate and endure each other well, there is a bigger chance of a smooth and gratifying relationship," explained Chugh.

Megha Jain (name changed) got married in December to her long-time beau, but after the honeymoon period, the 27-year-old wondered whether she had taken the right decision to marry the person she dated for over nine years.

"I don't know. I am still confused. Is it that men change after marriage or is it the perspective that changes? The person I knew before marriage has completely changed. I don't understand where the problem lies? Am I too demanding or has he become too casual?" grumbles Jain.

"I wish I could turn back time and get rid of this burden. I don't know what I have put myself into," she added.

Explaining this psyche, Chug said: "Very often, we choose to focus only on the brighter side of a relationship and forget to see the complete picture which might not be so pleasant.

"It is only later when one takes a complete view of the situation that one may begin to have doubts and confusions and would want to re-evaluate his/her decision."

Both arranged and love marriages have their pros and cons, but it is how flexible one is in contributing to a relationship that matters.

However, getting married to a person whom you know for a longer time has its advantages.

Said Parikh: "There is a basic comfort level in a relationship if you know the person for a long time."

Chug agreed: "An informed decision is always better than an uninformed one. If partners have known each other for a long time and have spent enough time to experience each others' moods, temperament and to understand each others' personalities, it will surely give them an edge over those who are complete strangers to each other."

Kiran Bhan, 55, recently celebrated the silver jubilee of her successful love marriage and shared its recipe.

"There is a lot of give and take in every relationship. In a love marriage, suddenly your priorities shift. All that lovely and flowery life turns upside down when you come face to face with reality. Your expectations from your spouse goes for a toss. You feel that he has changed and vice verse, but that is not the case," explained Bhan.

"In reality, you have to understand your spouse and assure him/her that your love is still the same. Nothing has changed. Adjustment and understanding is the key. There may be small things that will irritate you, but all depends on how dedicated you are towards a relationship to survive," she added.

Source: IANS

Men lie more than women

Men lie more than women

According to the study, on an average, a man will tell three lies a day, racking up 1,092 whoppers in a year. However, an average woman will come out with 728, fibbing just twice a day, reports The Daily Express.

According to the study, on an average, a man will tell three lies a day, racking up 1,092 whoppers in a year. However, an average woman will come out with 728, fibbing just twice a day, reports The Daily Express.

The study, which was commissioned by researchers at the Science Museum in London, found that 82 per cent of females questioned said telling a lie ate away at their conscience but only 70 per cent of men confessed to suffering pangs of guilt.

"Lying may seem to be an unavoidable part of human nature but it's an important part of social interaction," said Katie Maggs, the museum's associate medical curator.

"The jury is still out as to whether human quirks like lying are the result of our genes, evolution or our upbringing."

One Poll spoke to 3,000 adults for the survey.

The top 10 lies men tell their partners include "I had no signal", "I'm on my way", "I'm stuck in traffic", "Sorry, I missed your call", "You've lost weight" and "It's just what I've always wanted".

Source: ANI

Web boost for 2nd marriages

Web boost for 2nd marriages

Life deserves a second chance, more so when it comes to marriage and trying to meet the demand of those keen on walking down the altar again are matrimonial websites which offer specialised services.

There are a growing number of people keen on tying the knot again but this time with better judgement, prudence, discretion and a lot of help from matrimonial portals.

"We are seeing a growing demand of people who are looking for a spouse the second time over. We have one to two second marriages happening through our site every week", says Vivek Pahwa, CEO, Secondshaadi.com, which claims to have around 1.5 lakh members and sees a monthly addition between 5,000 to 10,000.

"There is a growing openness about second marriages" says Gourav Rakshit, Business Head, Shaadi.com, which has 10 per cent of its business coming from the second marriage market and sees a monthly addition of 10,000 registrations.

With the divorce rate increasing in the country and the fact that much of these divorcees were young (28-32), there had been a favourable tilt towards second marriages, says Murugavel Janakiraman Founder & CEO - Consim Info Pvt Ltd (Bharat Matrimony), which has registrations of 45,000 divorcees.

"Divorcees believe there is a worthy married life even after one bitter experience. Society also no longer views divorce as taboo", says Murugavel.

It is not just young divorcees who want wedding bells to ring again. There are also many who believe in 'better late than never' philosophy. According to Rakshit, their site receives profiles of those 35 plus never married, but who are open to the idea of tying the knot to a divorcee.

Widows and widowers looking for companionship also form part of the demand market. A small chunk also comprises the elderly 50 plus category. "We recently had a case of 76-year-old tying knot with a 63-year-old woman", says Rakshit.

The portals say that Internet has become a preferred choice in terms of second marriages as they offer more options in terms of matching criteria. Also they ensure privacy and ability to communicate regularly, which helped couples understand their compatibility ratio.

Though the second marriage market appears more skewed to men, there is also a sizeable chunk of women. The ratio is roughly around 60-70 per cent of males vis a vis around 30-40 women. "But this is more to do with better Internet accessibility than other reasons", says Rakshit, a perception that is also echoed by other players in the second marriage space.

Among its NRI clients where Internet penetration was equal, "we have around 52-53 per cent females registered with us", he says.

Increased financial independence and education level has a lot to do with women looking out for a successful second innings in marriage. Though much of those registered are self users, there has been an increasing number of friends, siblings and even parents chipping in. "We have 25 per cent of registration happening through these", says Rakshit.

The family now understands that divorce is not the end and are supportive, adds Murugavel.

The second marriage phenomenon is no longer restricted to being just a big-metro phenomenon and is slowly expanding to Tier II cities and very slowly to Tier III cities as well.

"We have registration from over 500 cities in India alone. However, top five -- Mumbai, Bangalore, Chennai, Delhi and Hyderabad -- account for about 40 per cent," says Murugavel.

The traditional parameters of searching for "fair, good looking slim bride" and "rich handsome" bachelors are not strictly applicable in the second marriage market.

"There is flexibility", says Murugavel. "While there is more relaxation in terms of education, income etc. -- family background appears more important. There is also the issue of emotional component. They are extra careful to avoid any mistake that they may have done in their first marriage and also discuss the compatibility level more", he adds.

Those opting for second marriages cut across economic strata and communities and educational background.

Though religion is a criteria for many, caste fell more into the preferred category, but not essential. More important were matching values and compatibility ratio.

Sensing a good business potential in the second marriage market, the portals have begun dedicated services catering to this section. Some like Shaadi.com have come up with specialised services like ensuring a detailed screening of candidates and verification of documents, says Rakshit.

Though most of the portals accept that end verification lay with the registered client, the initial process of matching preferences, educational backgrounds, age, community preferences, income backgrounds are taken care of by the portals and options are offered accordingly.

"We provide the platform and suggest matches, criteria and get them in touch which prospective candidates. Then the clients take over", says Vivek.

It could be anywhere from three to six months for an alliance to end up into tying a knot. "We offer various models as per requirement. While the retail model offers personal meetings, the other models offer online meetings and verifications", he said.

Though there is no clear data on the success rate of second marriages through websites, the current players are optimistic that the market is set to grow.

Vivek says for players to survive, privacy and ensuring value-adds as per demand are important.

Source: Indian Express

Ladies, hear this! Men get drawn to red hot lips

Ladies, hear this! Men get drawn to red hot lips

Want to catch a man's eye? All you need to do is practice your pout,for a woman's lips are the most attractive part of her body.Especially if she  wearing red lipstick.

A new study,carried out by scientists at Manchester University,has shown in the ten seconds after meeting a lady for the first time,the average chap will spend more than half his time gazing at her mouth.If she's wearing lipstick,he'll find it difficult to look away,with a dash of pink holding his attention for 6.7 seconds and red keeping him fixated for 7.3 seconds.

The study involved tracking eye movements of 50 men as they were presented with images of women.When the women wore lipstick,the men gazed at their lips for seven seconds spending 0.95 seconds looking at their eyes and 0.85 seconds studying their hair.However,when they went without make-up,the men got tired of looking at their lips after 2.2 seconds,instead devoting 2.97 seconds to admiring their eyes and 2.77 seconds to studying their noses.

This study proves that lips represent one of the most sensual aspects of a woman's body and play a critical role in human sexual attraction.Lips that are full and red deliver the perfect pout to achieve male fixation,but women who simply wear lipstick regardless of their lip type secure significantly greater levels of attraction than those who do not, according to Geoff Beattie, who led the research.

Source: ANI

Dating tips: 10 things a man should never ask a woman

Dating tips: 10 things a man should never ask a woman

An author has come up with a list of 10 top dating tips to guide men on what they should never say to women.

David DeAngelo, author of "Double Your Dating", says there is nothing worse than making mistakes

that will later be regretted and one way to avoid them is to remember the following, Bullz-Eye.com reported.

First of all, a m

an should never ask a woman if he can kiss her, as she will only say, a man should never "ask" for a kiss.

Asking her for a kiss will only make a man look like a boy, which is what a woman is not interested in, and even if she says "yes", it could mean she is just being polite, while on the inside her attraction meter will read a firm, "No".

 

 

Secondly, a man should never ask a woman if he can take her out on a date sometime, as she would like to be with a man who is a leader and in control, not someone who asks her permission to hit on her.

A man should confidently ask a woman out, by simply saying, "We should hang out... what's your number?" or tell her about a specific place he wants to take her to.

 

Thirdly, a man should never brag about the car he has or the kind of house he lives in, as it would seem like he is trying hard to impress her.

Women would be far more impressed by a man's material possessions if he does not mention them in conversation.

The fourth thing a man should never ask a woman is what she wants to do for the night,

as she likes a "man with a plan".

The man needs to have a game plan before he calls her, so as to ensure that she will not be burdened with having to think about what to do.

Fifthly, a man should never ask a woman if she likes him, as this is one phrase that turns off a woman completely.

He should just assume that she likes him, and never ask the question, as it would look like he has no confidence.

 

The six tip is that a man should never ask a woman why she never answered his message, as one, it would show that he cared she did not reply back, and two, it would give her a guilt trip, which is seen as insecurity by women.

 

 

 

The seventh tip is that a man should never ask a woman how many men she has slept with, as this shows that he is suffering from insecurity.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The eighth tip is that a man should never hint at a future date with a woman he has just met, as she not only wants but needs a guy who is somewhat of a "challenge", and will lose interest if she senses she has won.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The ninth tip is that a man should never end a phone conversation with a woman with a "next step", as firstly it would kill any spontaneity by being predictable, and secondly he would kill any chances of her calling him.

 

 

 

 

The tenth tip is that a man should never talk bad about a woman's guy friends especially if he hasn't met them and doesn't know her very well, as this is the fastest way for her to mark him as "insecure".

 

 

 

 

 Source: ANI

In a hurry to get married? Look before you leap

In a hurry to get married? Look before you leap

Couples who rush into marriage really are more likely to part ways, according to an academic study.

Researchers tracked the relationships of 168 couples over 14 years.

They found that those who had the shortest courtships were more likely to split up than those who had spent an extended period of time together before they married.

In the study, author Ted Huston, professor of human ecology at the University of Texas, concludes that 'the central task of courtship is for the two partners to make a sound choice, to be drawn into marriage for reasons that will prove out over the long haul.

"One of the risks of courtship is captured in Johnny Mercer's song 'Fools Rush In', wherein lovers put their hearts above their heads."

Huston said the seeds of divorce could often be detected from the beginning of a relationship.

"The courtships and marriages that are successful are the "best friend" ones, the ones that are slow and steady and unfold over time," the Daily Mail quoted Huston as saying.

"Positive feelings such as trust and respect emerge and the whole thing mirrors the evolution of any other kind of good relationship in life," Huston added.

Huston advises couples to 'enter marriage with eyes open to the strengths and weaknesses of one another and the relationship'.

The study has been published in the US journal Personal Relationships.

Source: ANI

Write your own will/Health

Write your own will

When discipline levels are abysmal, everything seems out of reach, be it following a diet or meeting those dreaded deadlines at work. It's even more frustrating because you are fully aware that your ability to achieve your life goals is largely dependent on being able to summon the willpower to take right action. However, there are strategies that can help.

Alter the route
In the book The Path of Least Resistance, Robert Fritz argues that "once a structure exists, energy moves through that structure by the path of least resistance. That is, energy moves where it is easiest for it to go." Similarly, the reserves of your willpower are also limited.

If your strategy is to rely on willpower alone, you will fail. A better approach is to use your willpower to create a structure that will allow your energy to move in the right direction. For example: In order to lose 10 kgs, you need to create conditions that will keep you on track.

So it's not just enough to get rid of all the junk food and cook healthy; it would help if you post them on the refrigerator, as a reminder to yourself. Then, start executing your plan and stick to the list. Once you've used that initial burst of willpower to alter the terrain, it will be easier to follow it. Work your objective backwards and use your energy to chart a clear course of action instead.

Self teach
Clinical psychologist Shalini Mehra recommends repeating your objective to strengthen willpower. "Constantly reminding yourself will help you keep your actions in check," she says. For example, if you're trying to cut down on expenses and get caught in a tempting situation, repeat something like "be free from debt" in order to muster up the willpower. Also, break down a large goal into small ones. Eg: if you wish to buck up on reading, read an extra page every day; if it's jogging, do an extra round every week.

Mediation
Reki practitioner Smita Dayal says, "A few minutes of meditation every day can do wonders. It builds up gray matter in areas of the brain that regulate emotions and govern decision-making. Focus your energy on feeling good, strong and in control of your actions. Reinforcing that thought makes you feel empowered."

Kick that temptation
Psychologist Shalini Mehra says, "Self-control is boosted when people focus on powerful memories of their long-term goals. Problems only occur when people are swayed 'in the moment'." Remind yourself of the importance of the goal. If you start thinking of your long-term objectives it'll instantly cool off the tempting stimuli.

Body and mind
Studies have also shown that glucose fuels willpower. Experiments conducted have proved that a person's exercise of will power is directly reflected in his/her blood glucose levels. This doesn't mean you stock up on sugary foods. Choose foods that keep glucose levels stable and ensure that you do not skip meals. Also as Mehra suggests, “Regular exercise helps. It releases endorphins, lifts spirits, and aids in better judgment.”

Support system
Surround yourself with self-disciplined people. A friend who exercises every day can help your workout regimen. Don’t just look for inspiration, though. Tell other people what you’re trying to accomplish and don’t underestimate the power of accountability.

Keep track
Keep a track of your self-discipline’s improvement. This can be really encouraging. Try keeping journals, recording weight loss, marking a calendar with Xs on the days you’ve gone for a run, and other small ways that will reaffirm your effort.

Source: Mumbai Mirror

Can marriage counselling be harmful?

Can marriage counselling be harmful?

Marriage counselling ‘makes couples feel their relationship is over’.

Seeking marriage counselling may not the best idea to save your relationship, a British report suggests.

The Department for Education report suggests that marriage counselling can do more harm than good as it makes couples feel like a failure and that their relationship is already over.

Most people would rather resolve relationship problems privately between themselves or with the help of close friends and family.

However, if they do resort to professional help then it was 'intrinsically linked with feelings of failure and defeat,' the reports suggests.

It also made people feel weak and that by the time a couple decided to attend relationship counselling it was often too late "to repair a relationship".

"Many of the participants felt that a couple should be able to deal with their relationship problems privately... without having to rely on external relationship support," the Telegraph quoted the report as saying.

"Support from friends and family was more acceptable than formal support such as relationship counselling.

"A few of the participants suggested that if a couple required formal or professional relationship support to solve a relationship difficulty, then the relationship was not worth saving and unlikely to be successful.

"Most of the participants reported that they would not use a relationship counselling service," the report added.

Source: ANI

Women find men in red more attractive

Women find men in red more attractive

Want to impress your lady love? Then dress yourself in red, as a new study has claimed women find the colour more appealing.

Red is known to increase the compatibility of women to men and has also been shown to enhance performance in sport.

But this is the first time German researchers have found that it works with men too as women find men more sexy when they are dressed in red than any other colour.

"Red is typically thought of as a sexy colour for women only," said lead researcher Andrew Elliot at the University of Rochester and University of Munich.

"Our findings suggest that the link between red and sex also applies to men," he was quoted by the Telegraph as saying.

For their study, the researchers asked a team of 25 men and 32 women to briefly look at a black-and-white photo of a man in a polo shirt, surrounded by a red or white background.

Using a nine-point scale, they answered three questions such as how attractive the person is, how pleasant is the person to look at and whether they want to meet the person in this picture.

Women who looked at a man surrounded by red or white rated the man surrounded by red a little over one point higher on a nine-point scale of attractiveness, a statistically significant bump. But, it had no effect on men.

Another experiment featured a man in a colour photo, dressed in either a red or a green shirt.

A pool of 55 women rated the man in red as significantly more attractive -- on average, nearly one point higher on the same nine-point scale.

They also thought he was more desirable would want to have romance with him.

Although red means different things in different cultures, the finding of women (but not men) drawn to men in red was consistent across countries.

Women in a follow-up study perceived men wearing red T-shirts to be significantly more likely to be high in status than men wearing blue T-shirts, in addition to the men in red seeming more generally and sexually attractive.

The findings appeared in the Journal of Experimental Psychology: General, published by the American Psychological Association.

Source: Indian Express

On Love and Fresh Air

On Love and Fresh Air

Who says a big romance has to cost you big bucks?

Woo her without going broke

This is for those who love to love but hate to spend - either because they are broke or because they are saving for the down payment for a flat or because they were taught the value of thrift from childhood. For them here is a piece of really cheap good news: while it is impossible to live on love and fresh air, it has been proved that it is perfectly reasonable to date a girl on love and fresh air. Provided you know the trade secrets- which I am going to share with you right now.

The first thing to do is to position yourself as a non believer of clichés. Hold forth on how juvenile and superficial you find the usual symbols of love like diamonds, roses and expensive chocolates. Say your piece with conviction and a condescending smile. Be a rebel with a cause - the cause of cliché free expressions of real love. Like a sprig of bougainvillea that you managed to tear off from an overhanging branch over a wall, when the security gu

ard was not looking. Or an impromptu ring fashioned out of toffee wrapping paper after you pop the toffee into her mouth and keep gazing at her with shouldering, unblinking eyes. Cost - Rs 5 for the toffee.

A long romantic walk is under-rated. Why not give it a shot?

And when it comes to taking her out somewhere special, do it in your unique style. Turn your nose up at 5 star coffee shops, fancy theme restaurants or even a shopping mall. Instead, suggest a long walk down the longest stretch in the city, holding her hand, telling her that this is how you dream of walking together in the journey of life etc. When her feet start aching, instead of hailing a cab or even an auto, offer to carry her. She will blush and smile and willingly walk on. Cost - Rs 0.

In case she wants to see the latest blockbuster, tell her that you don't w

ant to share the pleasure of watching a movie with her with five hundred other people. She will agree dreamily to the version you have on your old laptop, munching on bhajjis from the roadside stall, instead of popcorn and nachos. Cost - Rs 20. If you include the bhajjis.

YOU can be cheap for only so long. Eventually, she'll want something substantial

So if you are really determined to date with love and fresh air and Rs 25, then it is time you invested in a million dollar personality that will sweep women off their feet. However be warned - the love and fresh air phase lasts a year at the most. After that if you try to pass off a toffee wrapper as a ring , she will throw it in the trash can for sure. And guess what, she will throw you there as well!

Friends every single woman should make

Friends every single woman should make

At the outset let me be clear, if you are living with parents, in a girl’s hostel or as a paying guest, you don’t qualify for these words of wisdom because then you have a support system of sorts to fall back on. This is for that brave breed living completely on one’s own, fending for oneself, juggling work, boyfriends, girlfriends, mom’s nightly phone calls, shoestring budgets etc. You are the girls who could do with a ready retinue of service providers by using just a bit of your inherent tact and charm. Service providers who can make life as a single girl in the big bad city that much more comfortable. If that sounds like a deal, read on.

Start with service provider No 1, Raman,the security guard at your apartment complex. He may be a security guard for the rest of the residents in your building, but you can turn him into your knight in shining armour- the one who moves heaven and earth for you. In this case, he can move the furniture around before and after a party, or the bike parked in front of your car or your overloaded shopping bags when the lift is not working. You, in return, just have to gift an occasional biryani packet when you are ordering takeaways for friends, sympathies with his angst at the building society's indifference to his goodness, pass him a little tip for opening the gate after 2am for three consecutive days and smile at him dazzlingly on your way to work, on your way to the market, on your way to anywhere.

Mrs. Pandey living in the adjoining flat is the next service provider to focus on. Choose her because she is a stay-at-home Madam Perfect and can do anything from lending a bottle opener to taking in your ironing, keeping your spare keys and even coming forward with her extra gas cylinder when you discover you have no fuel for making your morning tea. She may even give you your occassional morning tea if you run out of teabags. In return, all you have to do is tell her how well her pink saree suits her, buy a weekly bar of chocolate for her whining two-year-old, share the mithai and pickles that your mom sends through whoever comes visiting and cluck sympathetically when she complains about her husband's tantrums, without telling her how amiable he is when he meets you at the lift or lobby!

Finally we have Sharmajee, the gentle soul who leaves for office in his freshly washed car, precisely when you are standing near the gate looking for an autorikshaw to take you to office in time for the Monday morning staff meeting. Just gaze at him, through a haze of unshed tears and watch the car slow down. 'Yes, if he could give you a lift, it would save your life,' you gush as he makes his offer. Don't forget to shower tidbits of gratitude all the way ,apologising abjectly for making him get late as he takes a detour to drop you at your office gate. And don't forget to nod at his wife, wave at his son, pat his dog, when they are taking their evening walk together. When he is taking his morning walk alone, beam at him from the balcony while commenting that he has lost some weight since you last saw him and is looking really fit. You will have made a loyal friend in need.

So now you know who your real friends are in this adult world, go ahead and cultivate them earnestly. With the Ramans, the Mrs Pandeys and the Sharmajees filling up middle-class apartment complexes across the Indian urbanscape, life for the single young woman working and living alone is more comfortable than ever before.

Gen-Yers have "very inflated sense of self"

Gen-Yers have "very inflated sense of self"

People born between the 1980s and 90s seem to be lacking strong work ethics.

Generation Y, or those born between the 1980s and 90s, generally believe they have a right to entitlement and lack work ethics, according to a new study.

Professor Paul Harvey, of the University of Hampshire, conducted a series of studies on a group of Gen-Yers to measure psychological entitlement and narcissism.

He found they scored 25 per cent higher than respondents ages 40 to 60 and 50 per cent higher than those over 61.

Professor Harvey concluded Gen-Yers are characterised by a "very inflated sense of self" that leads to "unrealistic expectations."

He pointed out that it subsequently leads to "chronic disappointment".

"Even if they fail miserably at a job, they still think they're great at it," the Telegraph quoted him, as saying.

Professor Harvey added that the sense of entitlement "gets ingrained in the formative years."

He said: "It stems from the self-esteem movement, telling kids, "You're great, you're special."

Source: ANI

Supermodel Miranda Kerr's 10 romance tips for men

Supermodel Miranda Kerr's 10 romance tips for men

Australian model Miranda Kerr has offered men ten tips on how they can have romantic harmony with their partners and continue doing so.

Kerr, 27, told men's lifestyle website Ask Men.com that usually it is the little things that count, and that no matter what, they should at all times be themselves and pay attention to their partner's needs.

She also said that staying healthy, showing affection and a willingness to pamper are also attractive qualities in the eyes of the fairer sex.

"In my experience, it is the random small gestures that I find the most romantic," the Sydney Morning Herald quoted her as telling the website.

"It could be something as simple as making me a cup of tea or being given a foot massage while we are watching a movie at home after a long day at work.

"If more men made an effort to do these little things for their partner throughout their everyday life they would be guaranteed to have a more romantic relationship," she added.

Kerr's 10 romance tips:

1. Treat her like a goddess

2. Pamper her

3. Be healthy

4. Get a baby sitter

5. Tell her she is beautiful and romance her

6. Don't be afraid to show her love

7. Know what you want

8. Connect with her

9. Listen to her

10. Buy the right size

Source: Indian Express

Dads enjoy less with kids than mums

Dads enjoy less with kids than mums

Dads not only spend less time with their kids, they don’t even enjoy that time as much as mums do, revealed new research.

Twice as many fathers say they "sometimes or less often" enjoy spending time with their children as do mothers, according to a report by the Australian Institute of Family Studies.

AIFS research fellow and the author of 'The Best Start: Supporting Happy, Healthy Childhoods', Jennifer Baxter said that when fathers were asked whether they enjoyed spending time with their children, 28 per cent said they "always or almost always" did, compared with 40 per cent of mothers.

In addition, 21 per cent of dads said they "sometimes or less often" enjoyed time spent with their kids, compared with 11 per cent for mums.

"Dads often have that added pressure of long work hours," News.com.au quoted her as telling The Australian.

"They're there in the mornings when time is so rushed and at dinner when there's so much going on, so that stress of combining work with the hard parts of the family day may be spilling over into their level of enjoyment," added Baxter.

Baxter said that part of the answer to why dads are less satisfied could be that they are more honest about it than mothers.

"There's a very strong ethos that mothers must love and care and nurture their children... while fathers might be more inclined to admit when things aren't going well," she said.

Source: ANI